Tips for Parents to Survive While Their Child is in the Hospital

After 14 and a half years and who knows how many hospitalizations with Ellie I have found what works for me to make it through inpatient stays without going crazy (mostly) or murdering a resident (yet)!

You will need to find what works for you, don't feel like you have to do the things that I say.

#1) Breathe.  No seriously!  Focus on your breathing.  Slow your breathing.  Do relaxation exercises,  Deep breaths.  Cleansing Breaths (breathe out the bad energy/thoughts/stress).  And above all just remember to breathe.

#2)  Start a blog.  I only update my daughter's blog when she is having medical problems.  I tell people, when I am not posting, she is doing well.  So I basically only update it when she is in the hospital.  There are several reasons why this helps. REASON 1)  It keeps people from pestering you for information.  I get so sick of telling people the same things 5 million times.  Plus I can't remember who I've told what.  REASON 2) It is journaling out your feelings to help you work through your feelings REASON 3) It is creating a keepsake journal of your hard times that you can look back on.  I like to include lots of pictures.  You can even print off a blog into a book to keep as a keepsake.  Here is a link to Ellie's Medical Blog.  http://elliebellygirl.blogspot.com/

#3)  Find a hobby you can do while sitting in the hospital.  Over the years I have done cross-stitch, digital scrapbooking, hand quilting, and reading.  Something to keep your mind and hands busy.  (They have a library of books you can borrow on the 1st floor of PCH).  PCH Child life can bring a craft for you to do.

#4)  Get up every morning and get ready.  Shower, do your hair, do your makeup.  Get dressed.  Do your laundry (the hospital has facilities for you to use...ask me if you need info for PCH).  It will help you feel better and have more patience.  I look better while inpatient than I do at home...ha ha!!!

#5) Go on a walk or get some exercise every day.  The Jewish Community Center across from Primary Children's allows you to go workout and swim there for free.  Ask about it in the Ronald McDonald Room.  If you are uncomfortable leaving the hospital walk the halls or do some stairs.  You can also walk the bridges that go to Moran and U of U from the 4th floor without going outside.  That being said...I think ideally you should go for your walk outside.  Getting some exercise will help with your endorphins and mood.

#6) Which brings us to... get outside at least once a day.  Breathe some fresh air.  Look at nature. Hospital air is gross and germy...get outside!  I don't do this every day...but I should.  I feel so much better after doing it.

#7)  I try to eat healthy while inpatient.  My bowels are always bonkers in the hospital because of too much stress.  If I try to eat better it helps out the bathroom situation.  I really do feel better when I eat healthy.  (This does NOT always happen....but it is my goal)

#8) I do treat myself to a treat once a day (trust me...it used to be every meal and snacks in between).  I usually choose hospital tapioca...I LOVE THE STUFF!

#9) Focus on the small victories.  ie: increased feeds by 5 mL, opened eyes, smiled, lowered oxygen for 5 minutes, etc...Try not to think about the future.

#10)  Split responsibilities if you have a spouse or someone to help you.  The way we split is that I worry about everything in the hospital and he worries about everything out of the hospital.  So the kids homework, finding childcare, taking care of the house, etc...all falls on him.  We still communicate everything going on at home and in the hospital.  But there is a clear line of
responsibility.

#11)  Talk to your nurse and ask if there is an hour (or 2 if you want it...I usually ask for 2) that you can have privacy.  I put a sign on the door and say "Mom is taking a nap from 2 PM-4 PM, come in if it is an emergency, otherwise, please come back later".  This gives me time to decompress, take a nap, have some alone time without people bursting in every 5 minutes.  In ICU you usually can't get 2 hours straight...but any amount of time is helpful.

#12) Have a hospital bag packed for both you and your child at home at all times.  Them when duty calls, you are prepared with your hygiene, clothes, meds, money, hobbies.

Those are my suggestions.  I would love to hear what helps you.  Please post below.

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